An epiphany of sorts

When talking to my sister today, she mentioned the blog,  A Cup of Jo, that referenced a discussed our societies propensity to speak to girls in terms of how they look.  I've complained myself how girls shouldn't be so focused on their looks and how it's a shame that young girls be concerned about their looks.  Imagine my surprise when I realized that I have unknowingly encouraged that!  My choice to initiate conversation with the girls I know almost always begins with something like, "you look so beautiful today, what a pretty dress, look at your cute hair-do!".  How to Talk to Little Girls (an article by Lisa Bloom) encourages adults to ask little girls about ideas and books, instead of complimenting their looks. 

The following excerpts are quotes from Lisa Bloom.

"Teaching girls that their appearance is the first thing you notice tells them that looks are more important than anything," says Bloom. "I always bite my tongue when I meet little girls, restraining myself from my first impulse, which is to tell them how darn cute/ pretty/ beautiful/ well-dressed/ well-manicured/ well-coiffed they are...It's our culture's standard talking-to-little-girls icebreaker, isn't it?"

(It's true! It's really easy and almost instinctive to compliment a little girl's appearance, don't you think?)

"Clothes or hair or bodies...it's surprising how hard it is to stay away from those topics with little girls, but I'm stubborn," Bloom writes. "Try this the next time you meet a little girl [ask her what she's reading]. She may be surprised and unsure at first, because few ask her about her mind, but be patient and stick with it...Model for her what a thinking woman says and does."


"This week ABC News reported that nearly half of all three- to six-year-old girls worry about being fat. In my book, Think: Straight Talk for Women to Stay Smart in a Dumbed-Down World, I reveal that 15 to 18 percent of girls under 12 now wear mascara, eyeliner and lipstick regularly; eating disorders are up and self-esteem is down; and 25 percent of young American women would rather win America's Next Top Model than the Nobel Peace Prize. Even bright, successful college women say they'd rather be hot than smart. A Miami mom just died from cosmetic surgery, leaving behind two teenagers. This keeps happening, and it breaks my heart."

How to Talk to Little Girls
Article by Lisa Bloom

Very good thoughts and ideas that I will try to remember from here on out!